I feel so idiot. Living in else life. I dont have a life, its all huan jue. Im living like a dog. a machine, an asshole. someone whom others can use and throw. someone not worth to rmb, someone who is stupid. Someone who cant think my himself, someone who follows a routine life. Someone whose life is already carved out, someone who is useless, someone who cant speak, someone who is F-unlucky, someone who cant survive, someone who dont know what he is typing. Someone whose life is not as precious as others, someone who have to undergo sufferings and not get any good in the end, someone who is dumb. Someone, who deserve to be f-uped, someone who stores alot of things but cannot dispel. someone who......... i dont know.

Im not childish, Im not happy, Im not joy, Im not glad. Laughing is a camougflage, smiling s fake, grinning is evil, Beam is nothing.

I dont care, I really dont want to care, care is nothing concern is nothing, its all crap. all crap. life is full of crap. missing alot of stuffs. as u grow old, You feel old, you feel crap. thats it. Infron of your eyes is alot of different kind of life. not those that u experienced its those he hope u will be in and those u hope u wont be in.

Ive nothing to say. Im craped up

11/10/2011

Its been how long since I last posted on this blog? Hmm I dont know. My days at the current camp are counting and I am going to get posted to a brand new camp starting a brand new lifestyle. Once again, stay in is looking for me again. around the corner, less then number of fingers I have, things seem to look good yet turning back to square one. Its so confusing to live once again. Its so difficult to understand, too deep to study and digest. I am on the verge of giving up yet no one knows. Someone use to tell me, clown is the saddest thing on earth because people tend to think that they are stressless yet theyre they have equivalent amount of stress to cope with after forcing themselves to smile for a whole day and eventually frown for the whole night.~

Im sick of life Im leading right now, but I don't show it. I want no one to pity me, because it feels the worst when the person you like, cares for you out of pity.~

When the time comes, we have a reset button in us where life is reset and you are in the cradle again.

cradle to the grave, grave to the cradle and back to grave.
swing into the sky, fly up high, thats 5minutes of heaven, look down, ure falling, accelerating so fast, u recall the day u were born and every minor and major event that happened in your life till now.. thats last few minutes and *Bang!* ure in hell.


whining in facebook is not good. nobody likes that, so Im not going to do that.. definitely...

its not early.. Ive nothing else to say.. sign off..
bubye.. the next time Im blogging... lets see... not sure.. but I'll be back..

To whine to blank space~